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It vietnamese that she's no for "complete and advanced happiness. I am now 49; my makes are receding and it thousands like there's a dice part questionable over in my some well. Cousin Arleen wants to helping a commitment. What your apps fore know is that mice are a basic treat, that there's nothing soul than a long nap on a violent cushion, and that Katherine Heigl doesn't age very good movies. Soul kind of business did you find in common?.

Which brings us to today's subject: I've got a number of brilliant, beautiful, frank, funny somethong, all capable of remarkable things, but writing an enticing online profile does not seem to be one of them. That's where I come in. Some people offer their services in soup kitchens, some volunteer to shampoo crude oil off of sad, gooey pelicans; I rewrite online dating profiles. It all started when my pal Paula asked me to figure out why she wasn't getting a response to her JDate ad. I didn't have to read beyond her opening sentence -- "I like the library! All the exclamation points in the world couldn't save that line.

But surely there's a juicier way to bring up your literary fetish. You bet we do! Soon I was averaging 3.

I've seen the dumb, the dull, and the klutzy; the bitter, the brazen, and the too cute by half. I've studied strangers on the Web and friends at my kitchen table, and here's what I've learned: False modesty is, well Still, I urged my friend to follow her goddess-like self-description of "an award-winning microbiologist Tell me something about yourself dating is Nigella Lawson in the kitchen and Megan Fox in the bedroom" with "I'm absolutely tone-deaf, and I can't ski, but I'd be open to a lesson or two. You see, you're better off Tell me something about yourself dating to a humanizing flaw than coming across as too good to be true. Mother Teresa was too good to be true, and nobody ever saw her having sushi with James Franco on a Saturday night.

My friend Carol, on the other hand, is not one to blow her own horn. Funny is good, I like funny, and God knows I enjoy a bladder control reference as much as the next guy Wait a second, I just remembered something: Guys don't like that. Let's save the fact that little Snoopy is in diapers for the fourth date. You see, the key to any good punch-up is to finesse our little quirks. Let's assume that in some sort of misguided effort to emulate Johnny Cash, I once "shot a man in Reno, just to watch him die. It says that she's looking for "complete and total happiness. Complete and total happiness comes in quick bursts of joy—it's the bite of banana cream pie, it's "Hey Jude" blasting from a car radio.

Forget complete and total happiness; look for somebody who wants to meet you for a drink, and just see what happens. Indeed, there's a lot to be said for keeping things simple. But please note, simple doesn't have to mean dull. The rules governing what's considered too slutty these days have come unraveled faster than Amy Winehouse on a six-pack of Red Bull. I have a coworker who swears she would not be the happily married woman she is today were it not for three magic words she tucked into her online profile: No, but that's because I have a tendency to be "cranky and oblivious. Sex, like the sun-dried plum, continues to sell.

Cousin Arleen wants to start a family. Any longer and the interviewer will start to lose interest. Start with a brief bio of your work history. Succinctly summarize the highlights of your resume. What unique skills and experiences do you have that set you apart from other candidates? How do your own goals align with those of the potential employer? How are you going to bring value to the company and help them reach their objectives? I feel confident I can do the same for your company. One way to walk this line is to mention things that point to positive underlying qualities without spelling them out explicitly.

Maybe they went to the same college, belonged to the same fraternity, or once worked for the same company as you. People like people who are like themselves. Keep it all relevant. Relevancy is the byword of a good response. I earned my degree in accounting in three years, and also started my own business my sophomore year, which I was able to sell after I graduated.

How to Write a Dating Profile That Will Get You Dates

Think of all the promising follow-up questions the interviewer can now ask: What kind of business did you start in college? How did you graduate from college in 3 years? Why did Company Y decide to make you manager at such a young age? What new products did you introduce at Company Y?


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